Parents

Last February (almost a year ago!), I moved 50 miles from my hometown of G to CK. It wasn't easy.... at all.

When you move to your boyfriend's town, you trust him (or I sincerely hope you would...why would you be with someone you can't trust?). We pretty much lived in what we call his "shak". It was an adventure. It was camping but 10x better than any other camping trip I've been on. It was my secret abode.. and it was magical. But then I wanted a shower of my own instead of sneaking off to the campground for one every now and then and a stove so I could make real food instead of buying the processed snacks at the DG.

So one day he comes home from work and says he's found us a place. He showed it to me right then and later we made contact with the landlord. We paid her the 1st month of rent that night. It was ours.

I trusted him. And I trusted her. To be a good, reliable landlord. Wrooooonng.

We would be in touch soon with each other to sign a lease agreement. Of course, for that, it means the electric must be in our name. And for that, one must have a deposit. And for being so young and having little-to-none credit, that meant a hefty deposit. So we were saving up. And we could afford it at the time.

But whaddoyaknow, CFEC (the electric company out here) pulls up in the yard one day while J is at work. He says he's there to shut off the electric unless we pay the bill. We hadn't put the electric in our name but I'd be damned if he came home to the electric shut off. Especially in the winter.

Extraordinarily, the exact amount of the bill was the exact amount I had in my wallet. Not shitting you.

So we kept the electric on. But guess what the worker had told me. Low and behold, our landlord was in jail. J - A - I - L. WTF?! It was pretty bad.

Despite that, we thought, or rather assumed, we were in the clear - at least for the next month - with the electric. Somehow we'd be able to get in touch with her. It's pretty hard when you're on the outside. Apparently, you can only talk to someone locked up if they call you. Pretty convenient, no?

Not more than a week later, CFEC is in the yard again. Great, what's going on now? To top it off, this guy was an asshole. No sweet tooth in his mouth. He said he had orders to shut the electric off. I was in disbelief. How could he do that if the bill is paid? It doesn't matter if the person (who's the electric is in) orders it to be shut off. (So he could get his $$$ deposit back). Welcome to the real world, sweetheart, and it's a lot colder than you'd imagine. Bring a jacket. Or two. There are a bunch of assholes out here and they don't care about screwing over a 19-year-old and a 17-year-old trying to make it on their own.

So guess what we had to do while waiting to make contact with the landlord?
We had to go without electricity. We were back to taking showers secretly at the campground. We had to go without a stove or a fridge. We had to go without heat in the dead of winter. We woke up several times seeing our breath inside the house. And this happened for two weeks.

Two weeks before the landlord's mom got ahold of us. She now had the power of attorney. With the next paycheck of Jeremiah's (I quit work in G and hadn't started looking yet for a job in CK just yet - while still going to class in G full time) & after signing the lease agreement, we had the electric turned back on. It was a great feeling to take a hot shower that night. We were so thankful. It didn't feel good to fork over so much cash just for that, but we slept warm that night and no, we didn't see our breath in our house the next morning.

Little while down the road, I get a job. But not long after that, another tragedy struck. While I was at work, too.

J was home. Had the neighbor over and somebody stopped by to see our neighbor. She didn't check around her vehicle for our baby boy. She went to back up and ran him over slightly. My sweet baby. 6 months old at the time. I had to come home and find out the bad news. (I think this is why me and J are so paranoid/worried of coming home to find him hurt/why we always take him with us). We drove to a place that was still open, which happened to be in G. They wouldn't accept payments and they wanted all the mu-la before even doing work on him. Grreeeaaattt. Cause we didn't have that kind of cash. I called my mom. She was willing to and did help us. Apollo wouldn't be alive without her. We also were accepted into the puppy fund which helped pay for part of his surgery. J had to keep working and I had to temporarily quit my job to watch over him and make sure he recovered just fine. We also didn't have a crate and when we ended up borrowing one, it just wasn't working for our pup. He hates confinement. And we don't want to encourage that. We each need our freedom of space.

So, money was tight again. I had to withdraw from some of my classes and failed the one I remained in. Not my shining moment. It was supposed to be my last semester before I graduated with my AA and moved on to the big school. I found out in February as well that I would be going there in the Fall.

Eventually, our baby recovered just fine & I got my job back. But shortly thereafter, there were problems at J's work and he needed a break from it. I could kind of understand. Well, actually, I would have quit a long time before he did. But his work was tough. 40-50 hours a week.

So it was just my paycheck, which was 1/4th of his each week, unfortunately. But we were getting by. I mean, we got by. We're still here today - alive, a little hungry, and a little stressed. But we're here and we're still trying to keep going.

For awhile, J didn't have a job or would be in between jobs. But for awhile, we made it. And there weren't problems with the house that weren't there before.

Then in May, we found out I was pregnant. I stopped with the Depo shot in April, immediately got my period, and then in May, went to the dr's for a test. It was positive. We were both in shock for a little bit at first but J went full swing into gearing up for "Daddy" mode. He's all into it. I'm still adjusting and preparing myself. It's because he has more experience with babies than I do. But I'll have plenty of practice in just a few months. Eeep!

And theeeeeen, the summer began and it was all hell. It was crazy. I got back into school mode, more motivated than ever, & ready to receive my AA! I was in G 2-3x a week + working while J worked too. Why I can't remember where he worked I don't understand. (Is this what they call pregnancy brain? Yikes) I was very tired, being in the 1st trimester, adjusting to pregnancy, doing classwork, working, and doing the usual household responsibilities as well as seeing friends. It was all a big blur. I hope family understands.

So I got my AA. And that was awesome! I'm still considering doing an AA celebration dinner in December when I would be walking across the stage. I just really need the money (sorry, but it's true).

But in the past few months, our house has practically fallen apart. I've learned more about this house and how disgusting it was even before we moved in. It was worse than what I saw of it. Which it was literally trashed inside and out, front and back, with crap.

The fridge was the first to go. Awesome..

Then it was the breakers. We have slowly dwindled down from living comfortably in 3 rooms - the living room, the bedroom, and the kitchen, to now being in one room. Seriously. We live off extension cords now. We have the TV with speakers, a nightlamp, a heater, and a mini-fridge.

We don't have hot water though.

We also had the car driver's window go out and the alternator go out.

Now the back tire doesn't stay aired up... even after NAPA claimed that they had fixed it. Mhm.

We've also had to ask for help at the Food Pantry to get by so we wouldn't exactly starve.

I looked for houses for rent and found T W O out here for rent. I don't know why people don't get it but there's not a surplus of houses that are available to be lived in out in CK. It's a small town. And when something does hit the "market", it goes by word of mouth and somebody who can afford it grabs it. Because the two I inquired about were $800/mo & $1000/mo. So yeah.

What we did was drive on the county road we live off of - from one end to other, stopping at every for sale sign we saw. Because if we were to be paying for a place and it were to be pricey, we were going to make sure we were going to own it.

And we found a house. 3 bedroom, 2 bath. Built in 2002. Sits on 1 acre, surrounded by pasture. Fenced in. Carport. 2 sheds - 1 to work in and 1 to house the water pump. It's beautiful and cheap. Compared to prices on the island or in G. It's perfect for us and the best fit.

A little birdie told me that my father was saving up enough money for a loan for me. I contacted him but he was of no use. He told me to pay off my debts (I have none...?) and to gain some credit. And then maybe I would be ready. *Eye roll* Sometimes you just hate somebody.

And then my mom offered to help. I didn't really want her too because she's done a lot for me. But she offered to and that was without me asking.

So we even was shown the place by the owners and the realtor with my mother present. I loved it. But she started doubting it. And then she started calling for places to see what kind of loans she could get. There was one option but she doesn't want to take it. Its 20% down (on a $70-80,000 home). She can afford to do that. And that means a quicker way of paying off the bill, less each month for us, and then I could pay her back eventually. I'm fine with that. I do owe her. But I need her help. Oh so desperately but I just don't think she's willing to go the "extra mile" for her daughter and expected 1st grandbaby. C'mon now. So I'm stuck. Because the lender she spoke with, told her he could try to work with me.... if I had a down payment and if I had credit history. He also said that to build up credit, it would take 4-5 months. I have less than 2 months, buddy, to get in a god damn house before this child of mine comes and I'd be damned if I had to come home to this. It's our home but it's not livable. I don't think my mom really expressed the urgency of the situation or the need. Who would say no and feel morally right to a 20-year-old pregnant woman just getting on her feet in a new town, trying to save money, trying to get in a new place while living in a dilapidated holes-in-the-walls with breaker problems and insufficient/incorrect installation of insulation. Now that's a tongue twister that'll give Sally with her sea shells a run for her money. Goodness. I'm quite mouthy and lengthy though when I write. Ask any of my previous English teachers. They'll tell ya.

So what am I to do?

Here's what I can do in the short run:

Get a credit card
And keep saving money.
Find a bank who may actually work with me and allowing me to take out a 1st-time homeowners' loan...

If there was one person who could financially help me, it would be my mother, yet she seems unwilling to help her babies out. The one person everyone calls selfless. I beg of you.